Pass No Judgement

So what do you do for a living? He asked. And I was quick to throw the question back at my friends boyfriend. He answered, I’m a gay escort. Funny how my inner judgy self didn’t go on hyperdrive. And I didn’t make any judgement at all, even I could not beleive what was going on with myself at that very moment. I simply smiled and asked him – and how’s that working for you?


The Brunch

I had brunch with a friend Saturday. When she asked me – “So how are you doing?” I was very eager to answer, said that I was doing fine. That I was busy trying to make both school and my job work. She replied – “So you’re in school again?” I did sense a feeling of perplexity and at the same time, distaste in her tone. But I ignored it, I really didn’t feel like arguing or explaining myself. So my reply was – “Yes, I’m back in school.” Hoping that she would leave the topic behind. And then she said – “Don’t you think you’re too old for that!” I was very surprised with her answer, and heaven knows that if I could have it my way. I would rather leave the table, pay the bill and disappear. But I couldn’t find it in myself to be impolite, so I kept my silence and tried to change the subject of our conversation. When she said – ” Really, don’t you think we’re too old for school and doing academic stuff?” She really didn’t want to leave the topic off, and that was when I decided to speak up – “No, I’m not too old for academic stuff and neither are you! And there really is no such thing as young and old when it comes to education. Besides, do we really ever stop learning? Cause if that’s the case, everybody would be stuck in the stone age! Don’t you think?” Her eyes were wide open after my reply. But she didn’t dare add fuel to the fire. Next thing we know, we were talking about love, marriage and divorce!

Odd Guy, Out!

I had a horrible-fun night. It did start out nice at first, invited friends over for dinner and then I lost it. I did, and it was horrifying envisioning myself and remembering the things I said. And truth be told, I am not proud of what I said. But I also have no regrets, I had to do it. I had to get the message thru.

It started out as a week end picnic plan, but turned out my friends already had there stuff for that day. So we all decided to have it Thursday night. I made a pasta dish; my friends brought some dishes and a couple bottles of wine. People came on time and we were enjoying dinner, when a friend made a comment about my clothes. Saying that it’s inappropriate and “so unfashionista”, but I ignored him. But what can I say, I am in my own home. Is there really a need to dress up, right? And then, he made another comment about my place, saying that my decor was “all over the place.” Again, I kept my mouth shut. Although, my friends were starting to give me a look. The kind where they’re silently begging me not to say anything. Again, I ignored it. And then, they all decided to have a smoke in the garage. When my friend saw my old Honda Civic, and said – Oh my gosh, you’re still driving this car? Who drives this car nowadays? This is like the 90’s!

I exhaled and eventually, exploded – FYI, that car isn’t the 90’s. That is a 2000 Civic! And how dare you embarrass me in my own home. You are one self absorbed demeaning freak! I suggest you get your jacket from the closet and leave my undesigner house. And stay the f*ck away from my unfashionista life, will you? And would you please get out of here right away, before I loss my cool and ran you over with my car. Get out, now!

Long story short, my ex-friend left. And soon as my front door closed, the four of us remaining started laughing. Seems like everyone’s uncomfortable around him. And what’s great, is that the night ended well. Not to mention fun, after all the unpleasantries that happened.


Old Friends

There’s hearts filled with laughter
and eyes moved to tears
with memories so vivid
transcending the years
the words of compassion
and actions so kind
the sun smiles down, when
old friends come to mind.

I’ve counted my blessings
and shuffled my dreams
and sang to the music
of deep forest streams
searching for places
the light always shined
like deep in my soul, when
old friends come to mind.

I count you among
all the guides on the path
who loved me and taught me
to dream and to laugh
when I reach my heaven
I know that I’ll find
this heaven was built
by old friends, I call mine.

Gone Fishing

Potty Mouth

My good friend Shay invited me for some drinks last night. So, I kindly asked my sister to dropped me off at Chevy’s. Soon as I saw my friend, she said ” Friendship, I have two words for you: lose weight!” I must admit that I was bit offended, and that out of nowhere I replied “Darling, how about we get rid of your stinking breath first!”

Wholly crap! Why did I say that? When I know I shouldn’t have. But my mouth does not do good under pressure. I immediately apologized to my friend and she did the same. But guess I still feel bad till now. Sigh, me and my potty mouth…





Pushing My Buttons

I don’t know how many times my good friends have warned me about, Marty. Saying, he’s been blabbing behind my back and spreading rumors here and there. But then I’m not a person who you can easily convince, I don’t go for he-said-she-said stuff. I would rather hear it from the source and settle issues with that person face to face. That’s just me and how I would handle such matter.

So here we are at a friends farewell party and nobody knew I was coming (except for Cee Cee). I was surprising my good friend, Ivan who’s moving back to Sweden in the next couple weeks. Cee Cee out of nowhere came and dragged me to the kitchen, telling me keep my voice down as we listen to someone’s conversation. I was totally surprised, I didn’t know who we’re listening to. But somehow, I was glad she brought me there. For finally, I caught Marty descanting one lie after another. I stood behind the refrigerator with Cee Cee and I heard everything he has to say about me. It was absolutely awful, and all lies to begin and end with. However, Marty was interrupted when he heard a common friend call out my name. And then he dashed off and locked himself in the bathroom. Truly, he didn’t have the balls to face me. I wonder why?

Two hours have passed and almost all the guest have left. Cee Cee and I were patiently waiting in her car (I hid mine a block away from Ivan’s house) for Marty to get out. I just couldn’t leave without confronting my ex-friend (that’s what he is now). I also wanted this gossiping to end, once and for all. And I wouldn’t be in peace, if I let the night pass without saying a word. And so, after ten minutes of waiting we  saw Marty sneeking out thru the back door. But dumb fool, he parked his car a couple meters away from Cee Cee’s. And soon as he was about to get in his car, I showed myself and he was shocked in disbelief. He turned pale and was freaking nervous, that he couldn’t even put his key in.

“Oh dear, Marty. You can’t leave just yet, we have some unfinished business to attend.” I said to him. His eyes were wide open, “Please Nell, don’t hurt me!” I had all the plans of beating him up, but I didn’t. “And why would I do that, Marty? Do I look like a mob to you?” I said with a grin. Suddenly he got on his knees and said, “God, I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry! I won’t do it again.” Looks like someone’s guilty. “But we haven’t even discussed anything yet.” And here’s Cee Cee behind me laughing. She yelled out, “You are one piece of timid scum, Marty!” Obviously, he was scared as hell and  almost peed in his pants. I felt sorry for the guy, so I just said to him, “Hey Marty, I’ll keep this talk short and simple, okay? If I ever hear you talk smack about me again. There will be no confrontations like this. I’d rather beat the living daylight out of you than talk garbage. Are we clear?” He nodded and then I turned my back. Marty quickly got in his car and drove off. Cee Cee and I gave each other a high five and went separate ways after.

Honestly, I was so close to wrestling Marty down if not for Cee Cee who talked me out of it. She told me to think a couple times before taking actions. But I swear, the next time he does that to me. I certainly wouldn’t mind teaching that fool a lesson. My two year Judo training would certainly come in handy. Hahahah!

Goodbye, Lola Socorro

She came into my office four years ago, asking for help with her medical bills. Guess, she thought our department handles patient billing. She was mad, complaining that people are giving her the run around. That was how I first met her, all grumpy. I did help and directed her to people (I know) that can give her assistance. And from that day onwards, she started calling me Apo (grandson).

Every now and then, she would come to see me in the hospital. Bringing me stuff from her hometown in Bicol and sometimes, she’d be bringing homemade goodies. That’s the Lola Socorro I know, kind hearted and open handed. So when the news go to me this morning that she passed away from colon cancer. I couldn’t help but feel upset. I had to stop in the middle of my house chores, got on my knees and said a little prayer for a dear friend and my adopted grandmother.

I will miss her dearly: her smile, her love and her ever generous heart. Namomo-ot ako sa imo, Lola…